An Attitude of Gratitude

We planned the camping trip for weeks. Our friends invited us to spend the weekend with them at a “buddy” campsite in Pocahontas State Park. There would be 6 adults and 4 children between the ages of 2 to 4 years old. We would be sleeping in tents, and eating around a campfire. We were all looking forward to hanging out and watching our kids have fun playing together. The forecast at the beginning of the week called for rain during our weekend camping adventure, but we were optimistic. After all, the forecast is never reliable, and we were sure that it would all turn out fine. The day of our camping trip arrived…along with temperatures in the mid-40s, lots of nasty wind and (you guessed it) a constant drizzling rain. We drove to the campsite to meet our friends. When we arrived, they were already settled in, with a cozy campfire going and a tarp strung over the picnic table. I looked at my husband with pleading eyes and a whine in my voice and whispered “Really honey? We are really and truly going to stay here in this weather?!” He looked at me with love and patience (as he often does) and simply said, “Yes, and it’s going to be fine. I’m going to set up the tent now.” He walked away and left me to wallow in my self pity. I realized very quickly that this was not a productive attitude, so I started unloading the car, joined my friends, and eventually joined in the fun as well. The positive attitude of my friends, along with the laughter of our children as they ran around us, soon made me realize that even in the yuckiest situations; there is much to be thankful for. The next day dawned cloudy and cold, but blessedly DRY all day, and I found myself very grateful for that one small favor. Sometimes the smallest blessings teach us the greatest lessons. We all have our weaknesses, and mine is certainly a plush 5-start hotel…but I want to teach my son to have an attitude of gratitude, no matter what lemons life may hand him. So if you feel like I do, check out these tips for teaching children to be thankful:

1. Make a List. Take some time as a family to make a list of the things you are grateful for. If you have young children, they will likely say things like a favorite toy or food. But sometimes they will express thanks for a family where they feel safe or for mommy and daddy’s hugs. The older ones may mention access to a car or the concern of a parent. It will be interesting and fun to watch their priorities change as they grow older.
2. Set the Example. Parents have to model behavior they hope their children adopt as their own. A simple, sincere expression of gratitude when the kids do something they were asked to do is always appropriate. Taking an extra moment to thank a sales clerk at the store or to say a kind word to the person who holds a door for you lets them know that gratitude is acceptable and encouraged. Teach Through Role Playing. If you notice a lack of the gratitude attitude, consider a little role playing. Have the kids act out a scenario where someone went out of their way for someone else, and have the receiver express gratitude. You might even consider a negative example and see how the giver feels when his or her giving is ignored.
3. Offer Service. Maybe you have an elderly neighbor who could use help cutting their grass.... or you could donate your money, time, or food to a local food bank for those who are less fortunate. Offering to help someone else in need, will often cure the need to feel selfish.
4. Try Going Without. From time to time, have a family project that involves going without something important. For example, try camping in 40 degree rainy weather with only a campfire to keep you warm, or try walking to any destination less than two miles away. A little sacrifice causes us to miss things that we take for granted and helps us be a little more humble and grateful when the thing is restored.

Some of the useful ideas from this article were gratefully borrowed from Wayne Parker’s article “Teaching Children To Be Grateful”. Click on the title of the article if you would like to read it.